Random Write Turn This Week Syllabus

trigger: flabbergasted

I think I sometimes personalize words, actions, and inaction to the point where they reflect on me as flaws. That being said, this far from a normal, carefree week. This is far from this past week where traveling was done amongst relatives and I viewed an iconic city for what it really is. But after leaving that city - hence the phrase "you never know a good thing 'til it's gone - it became all the more precious.

The purpose of this post is a crucial one and it's to gather my bearings and reassess objectives, organize, as well as to prevent my mind from deviating from the tasks at hand. Some things must be addressed and hopefully finished by this weekend:

- Abroad application (true date: 4/1; want it done early)
- Shakespeare presentation for the USC - trimmed draft (shorten to at least 7.5 pages; 2min/1pg); my standing in this conference is rather interesting since I am the only non-English major who is a participant, my affable alternate being an exception. I shall hopefully request of them to explain themselves upon reflection of whether or not they know they made the right choice in studying English. The true answer shall surface years from now, or not. The experience of being force-fed books and writing in a never-ending spiral comes off as being rather tiring. Not all writers can work at such a pace, least of all myself
- GB301 finish Assignment #2
- Decide whether or not to buy those 2 round trip tickets to Maui before another Middle Eastern or Central Asian country undergoes a civil uprising, which will indubitably affect the spot price for oil
- Get that judiciary hearing out of the way

Side note: I'm personalizing this as well. Throughout my school years preceding University life, I had been called into the office many a time. My disciplinary standing was rather average - I like to say so because it is strange for children not to deviate from the task at hand (I've tripped myself indirectly saying in this post that I am a child). Most children are work in progress (adults included) and are volatile to emotions and adolescent chemical imbalances. My indiscretions were the product of my own adolescent volatility, as well as self-perceived self-righteousness, mixed with being victimized by the elite (I don't even know if I can call them elite; sure, they are elite in the sense that their parents are great and they are being royally marshaled into their parents' shoes. That's elite. OK. My concern has to do with academic elitism, not the brown-nosing GPA big game hunters, but the enlightened - sometimes snobbish - core of the student body, the ones that know useless information but seem to be much more important than the rest. You know they will succeed. And when they do, I wonder if I shall too and meet them again, head-on, in that real world).

- Attend various performances/seminars at my leisure
- De-stress sometime in between; technically, I am doing precisely that at the current moment. Respites. Tea time without the tea, thanks to my indiscretion which gives necessity for said judicial hearing

What's going to happen? I want to control that but I need to be in a place with friends or actually, at least in a place where I can make friends. Hopefully by then I'd have met someone. Or kicked the bucket from overwork. I am no workaholic. My Mom is. I'm not greater because my words do not reap fruits because they are neither labor, nor active innovation. They are but observations and ideas that will not come to fruition. I haven't the resources or the mindset to employ myself so as to be great. And now I'm starting to have doubts about my casual dream - being a teacher. The whole point would be to do it for the kids but I need to be in the right mindset by that time. I'll, of course, need to be much more confident in speaking, as well as better flowing when it comes to lecture. Public speaking ability. Now that is something to be desired.

On top of it all, I'm reading Daniel Quinn's Ishmael series, certainly not something you should read when you need to stay focused with academic work and put up with meaningless jargon and tasks that result in just another gold star on a piece of paper reflecting you as a person. Everyone works, some harder than others. And then some have an expanded capacity for work, some of it being quality. I am smoldering, I think. I forget which writer I'm quoting - too lazy to do MLA or citations; sorry whoever you are! I would prefer a world in which life isn't so pettily focused on a career track or being confined to an office room or building all day. What if we grew wings? What if _____?